====== My Confession ====== A Fool's confession to Aha. ---- //A sheet of paper found lying in the "Golden Confessional," detailing the tormented confession of one of the Fools.// To my friends, my foes, too all who know my identity as a Masked Fool, I offer my confession. As a fellow Pathstrider on the Path of Elation, I am an incorrigible embarrassment to the cause. The countless, exquisite, pulchritudinous schemes so painstakingly and assiduously designed by my predecessors have, under my watch, devolved into mere acts of paltry charity.\\ //(Ugh, so may fancy words... I'm just not funny! I hate my high level of education!)// To those I have failed to deceive, fool, trick, or harm, I offer my confession.\\ I was just trying to pull a prank. How did it turn into a good deed!? That was not what I intended. Titanic tides of gratitude and praise overwhelm me with the burdensome guilt of being undeserving, and the mortifying shame of being more trouble than I'm worth.\\ //(Alas, I couldn't help but use more antiquated prose. I hate it! Why is my literary skill so profound?)// O, Laughter, Master of Elation, Aha, I confess to YOU.\\ I've forgotten the beginning and the end, but the point is, I confess. nothing I do is remotely funny. It's utterly pathetic! I just don't' get it. Why is destiny so cruel to me, specifically? Everything I hope for turns into its exact opposite... I once posed as a councilor and demanded that the booze-loving Duchy of Pemberton ban the production of alcohol. They ended up creating the galaxy-famous Pemberton Cola with sugar and soda... and it sold far better than their booze ever did! I once changed the formula for a glue company, making them produce the least sticky adhesive in the world... They used it to create "sticky notes" that can be applied and removed over and over... and I have to admit, they're incredibly useful! So now I'm some kind of saint, a great promoter of scientific advancement. Alas! How may my sins be recounted, for they are beyond reckoning! Verily, they are far from redemption!\\ //(Wait... Am I actually a Classic Literature Fool!?)//